Personal growth is a consistent thread that runs throughout our lives. It may not always be obvious, but it’s that terrifying leap out of our comfort zone, it’s actively choosing to create change, and tackling the unease of being a beginner and making mistakes as you learn the ropes.
Although it may seem an abstract concept, we can group personal growth into distinct categories, and by doing so refine our focus, reassess our goals, and decide where we want to dedicate our energy.
With this new understanding, and a sprinkling of practical tips, you can build awareness of the type of growth you want to focus on, and easily put strategies in place to access each form.
The four types of personal growth:
- Emotional growth
- Social growth
- Intellectual growth
- Career growth
Let’s take a look at each in detail below:
1. Emotional growth
Overview
We face hundreds of stimuli every day which can cause us to express emotion — joy, fear, happiness, anger, embarrassment. Our emotions have been likened to a colour palette — with some experts saying we can experience up to 27 ‘primary emotions’ plus hundreds of ‘shades’ in between. We can vary the intensity, mix the colours and create different tones.
It’s true, our emotions form a huge part of our lives. From the moment we are born, we possess the ability to smile, and within six weeks of age, can display expressions of interest. Our emotional palette only increases from there, as experiences, our environment and biology intermingle to allow us to develop the rich diversity of feelings we know today.
However, with all of this, we can be like a pebble on the beach, caught up and tossed around by the waves of our emotions, with little sense of being able to take control.
True personal growth isn’t simply about possessing the diversity of colours on our emotional paintbox. It’s about learning to utilise them to paint a picture of our choosing. When we blend self-awareness, regulation, and introspection, we can unlock a whole new emotional capacity. Step in, emotional intelligence.
How to develop your emotional intelligence
A cornerstone of personal growth is emotional intelligence. Yes, you’ve heard of IQ, but turn your gaze inward, and you’ll discover a hidden library of knowledge known as emotional intelligence. The reason it has yet remained undiscovered to you may not be surprising — after all, it’s so easy to tune out to the noise of our emotions. We forget that we are in control, let our emotions simply… happen to us.
Emotional intelligence is the opposite to that. It is defined as the ability to recognize, interpret, and regulate our own emotions, while better understanding those of other people.
Learning to tune back into the frequency of our feelings is a key part of emotional growth. Emotional intelligence starts with self-awareness and self-regulation. Start being able to name your emotions and their effect on you, and you can soon start to regulate them too. Take back control! Instead of being the pebble tossed by the waves — you can be the surfer riding them. Then you can look outwards and begin to work on empathy and social skills — the two other components. Finally with a healthy dose of motivation (the 5th component) you can encompass true emotional growth.
Practical exercise
Journal: Find a journaling style that suits you. It doesn’t have to amount to lengthy paragraphs! If you’re not one for writing, try the ‘weather check in’ method — simply noting down what weather represents your emotions on that day. Just the act of taking time to notice your feelings is already a huge first step towards building your emotional intelligence, whilst journaling itself contributes to all aspects of personal growth.
2. Social growth
Overview
As far back as 2.6 million years ago, we have interacted as social groups. Socialising is part of our evolution, and we humans are hard-wired to connect. Where once we would grow our social network to share resources or protect ourselves from predators, we now connect to enrich our lives, find like-minded individuals, or even further our careers.
Our inner circle might consist of ‘our tribe’ — a community we create for ourselves in which we feel a sense of trust, safety and the ability to be our authentic selves. Or we may be a social butterfly, flitting between numerous social groups, with hundreds of connections blossoming around us.
But whatever our socialisation style, often there’s a risk we can get stuck in what’s comfortable, to the detriment of our personal growth.
We develop a repertoire of communication skills which allows us to converse with those around us, in the language both us and our peers understand. Hidden under our safety blanket, we don’t seek to develop our communication skills to enrich our interactions. We miss out on valuable connections by not actively pursuing networking. Or we look around us, only to discover that we have unwittingly made an echo chamber of our own view points. How do we actively pursue social growth?
How to develop your social growth
We all know that growth happens outside our comfort zone, and while it might seem counter-intuitive, actively put yourself in to situations where you feel uncomfortable.
They key is to take it step by step:
- Identify the situation that makes you feel uncomfortable: It could be a conversation in which you need to use an unfamiliar communication style, or networking with a different group of people.
- Examine why you feel uncomfortable: The chances are it’s not the whole situation — try and drill down in to the specifics. For example — you might feel anxious about speaking in large groups, but when you get forensic, you realise it is actually the fear of people rejecting your ideas.
- Once you’ve got to the nitty gritty, set one action you can put in place: that will lead you closer to resolving your identified blocker. You might have a trusted friend to come to networking events, or a breathing exercise in place before public speaking.
Practical exercise
Self assessment: Undertake a 360 assessment of your communication strengths and weaknesses and get curious. Seek to learn, not just grow! Ask friends, colleagues, partners, and even people you don’t know so well. Once you’ve identified your blind spots — now it’s time to grow. Actively seek out situations that push you out of your comfort zone and encourage growth in your communication style.
3. Intellectual growth
Overview
The foundation of intellectual growth is a hunger for knowledge and learning, the exploration of new ideas and the pursuit of challenging concepts and diverse or novel ideas. But when we talk about social growth, aside from expanding our knowledge, what about the physical growth of this amazing mass we call our brain? Our brains are growing from the moment we are born, with the process of neurogenesis resulting in a huge increase in synapses up from 2500 to an immense 15,000 by the time we are three.
But our brain doesn’t stop after childhood. New research shows our brain remains malleable to new experiences and learning, even in our adult years. This remarkable plasticity of our brains (called map extension neuroplasticity) allows us to quite literally remodel our ways of thinking, form new connections, and grow different parts of our brain, like a muscle in our body. We can invest more in pathways that matter to us, and less in those that don’t serve us, actively remodelling our brain.
And with endless sources of information at our fingertips, there is unlimited possibilities for expanding our minds, pursuing personal growth, and laying down those new neural networks. Yes, we really can actively grow our brains.
How to develop your intellectual growth
- Stimulate your brain and learn a new skill: Learn a new language, a musical instrument, playing video games, drawing… all of these are shown to promote neuroplasticity, alongside other cognitive benefits.
- Exercise: Numerous studies have proven the benefits of exercise to our brain. Not only does it increase blood flow to the brain, it increases BDNF (brain-derived neurotrophic factor) which aids growth and the strength of synaptic signals.
- Sleep: Research shows that sleep increases dendritic growth, while lack of sleep potentially inhibits neurogenesis.
- Mindfulness: There are a wealth of studies showing the benefits of mindfulness. MRIs from patients undergoing an 8-week mindfulness programme uncovered visible structural changes in those who completed the programme. What’s more new research has revealed that mindfulness training can train the brain to optimise and enhance its typical healthy functioning.
Practical exercise
Do something different: Our environment provides tonnes of stimulation for our brain — every day is an opportunity to ignite our imagination, spark new ideas or lay down new pathways. A simple way to do this is taking something you normally do and doing it differently. Try using your non-dominant hand to perform some activities, or simply go on a different route on your commute.
4. Career growth
Overview
Our career and job forms a large part of our lives, weaving together passion with a sense of purpose and progress. Yet once we have one foot on the ladder, we can often feel that the only way is up! By thinking of our career in terms of unidirectional movement, we limit our growth. Consider the type of development that encompasses lateral expansion and even moments of regression.
Once we begin to challenge the notion that career growth must follow a linear path and explore the richness of development in its many forms, we can tap into a new type of career path. Imagine having time to grow your skills repertoire, expand your knowledge on a specific topic, take a step back to prioritise other areas, or diversify and switch altogether. No form of growth is off the table — but it’s only up to you to decide which type you need at the time!
How to develop your career growth
- Assess: Identify your goals for your career. Be aware of any potential ‘should’ statements’. E.g. “I should be at this level”. Your goal now could simply be to have a better work-life balance.
- Address: Is what you are currently doing moving you towards that goal? Be honest. If it feels like you are actively moving further away from your objective — is it time to switch?
- Access: What can you access to help you move towards that goal? Is it more learning resources? Is it time to learn a new skill? Is it a role that utilises a new set of skills?
Practical exercise
SWOT Analysis: Conduct a SWOT (strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, threats) analysis of your career. Identify your strengths and weaknesses, opportunities for advancement, and potential threats to your career progression. Use this analysis to identify areas where you can leverage your strengths, address weaknesses, and capitalise on opportunities.
Final thoughts…
So now we’ve shone a light on personal growth, a (perhaps) previously uncovered part of your life. You’ve unlocked a whole new bounty of knowledge, that allows you to make your next steps.
Remember to be gentle with yourself. Growth isn’t a race, and there is no shame in acknowledging that you have weak points. Ultimately, the power of personal growth is that the only person in control is you.
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